My facebook post on Dec. 18th, 2013
“I have seen such sweet compassion come from my hubby this week by doing things for our failing Max. I have seen the gift of “comfort” in both my girls as they try to coax him to eat or drink, or by covering him with their blankets. Today at 4:30 we will be saying our final goodbyes to our first pet as a newly married couple. Please pray for P and I as we take him later today and for the girls.”
One week before Christmas we had to put our sweet boy, Max, down. It was so hard. The worst part was watching him struggle. We knew it was time, when he couldn’t get up anymore. We were hoping he would pass in his sleep. He stopped eating and drinking 4 days before we had put him down.
I went into that room, at the vet’s office, determined not to look at his face when the vet gave him that shot. I didn’t want to put myself through that pain, but I felt like he deserved that from me. He trusted me. I was his whole world.
I watched him go peacefully…
I saw the pain leave his eyes,
I saw the fear leave his eyes,
I watched the light leave his eyes,
….It was so hard.
My girls wrote him notes. We buried the notes with him.
I cried for days!
I expected him to stand up from underneath his favorite blanket. I expected him to be at my feet. I expected him to come barking when we came home. I expected him to be in the kitchen when I was cooking. The house was so quiet.
Minnie, our Yorkie, kept looking for him in every room. She would wait for him to come in from outside. For her sake, I took his blanket away and washed it. She finally stopped looking for him.
I wondered what people would think of me if I grieved for MY DOG! Of course there are TONS of animal lovers out there, who I knew would understand, but I also knew that there would be people who just didn’t get it. I kinda freaked myself out with how sad I really was. The stupid “beggin strips” commercial came on and I was sobbing! (Even now, while writing this, I’m crying.) I looked up Bible verses on grief, I looked up websites that gave advice on grieving for your pets, and I talked to anyone who would listen. I found so many people who just wanted to tell their story too.
My poor husband and girls. Here I was, the MOM…the one who is supposed to be comforting them! They were the ones comforting me. At one point, we were having a family movie night, and my youngest looks over at me, sitting there sobbing over a funny movie! She starts jabbing her dad in the ribs and he looks over at me, and says, “it’s o.k. girls…Mom is gonna be sad for awhile.”
Don’t get me wrong, He was NOT the best dog. In fact, he was the most obnoxiously loud, misbehaving dog ever! So much so, that…
We bought our HOUSE because he would bark all day in our first apartment!
He got into the trash EVERY DAY! We bought a special trash can with a lock on it. He even had that apart!
He stole food, taking fingers with it sometimes.
He would take WHOLE LOAVES OF BREAD off the kitchen counter and eat the whole thing, and then would BARF IT BACK UP ON THE COUCH!
He ate the girls stuffed animals. He even ate my antique baby doll I had as a girl.
He ripped holes the carpet 3 times!
Towards the end, he peed on everything. The steam cleaner became a piece of furniture in the family room.
BUT, despite all that, we loved him…and he loved us.